I had a horrible falling out with my best friend, and quite honestly it was very one sided. She will always be in my thoughts and I hope the best for her, but it still doesn't hurt any less. It makes me realize that you shouldn't be so open with one person (other than your significant other), because no matter how open you are and how trusting, they will crush your heart regardless. I have had this happen once before, but under a completely different circumstance and it was mutual on both ends... This time, there was no explanation, no speaking, etc. it was just plain done and it was by email, which she knew that I had horrific emails that had been sent to me throughout the pregnancy and what she said, I knew was the final word. It was heartbreaking. I am however, not innocent in everything, but what she accused me of was incorrect and if she had spoken to me first, she would have realized that whoever told her these slanderous things didn't have their facts 100% straight. You go to the damn source. I am not the person who sits around and talks badly about someone else... I would say it to their face. However, I am human.
I saw a great quote that made me realize that no matter what, even if the friendship was fixed... there would always be those cracks and trusting aspects of it.
Friendship is delicate as a glass, once broken it can be fixed but there will always be cracks... A simple friend thinks the friendship is over when you have an argument and that is a true coward. A real friend knows that it’s not a friendship until after you’ve had a fight and made up.
However, to me she wasn't considered a simple friend, but her actions were like one. There wasn't a fight and there wasn't even a chance for me to really speak. It wouldn't matter. No matter what I said, I can see her mind being completely made up and I am sure her husband also had his mind up, which ruined Clark's and his relationship. Don't get me wrong, I did things, but so did she. I am a lot different though, I would speak to her first about it or just let it go because if it doesn't come from the horses mouth it doesn't count. But then again, I don't involve my husband in my fights with friends. A husband alone can ruin a friendship. I've seen it before.
She mentioned she did want to talk at one point, but because of my high blood pressure the last few days, I can't jeopardize my baby's health by stressing out and worrying when she will come around to talk to me. I need to just let it go. I just now need to realize that friends come and go... the ones who are closest are the ones who hurt you the most. Some people go with the same best friend for years, others aren't so lucky. There are so many aspects to a friendship that it just depends on how one person will act with another. It was truly so sad and heartbreaking.
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